friend: are you ok? you’ve never been an anti-hug person before lol
what she says: i’m fine
what she means: since realizing my sexuality i feel almost predatory showing any physical affection even towards my closest friends, and though i know that my gaze is not a man’s gaze, years and years of internalized homophobia and misogyny has led me to believe that i can’t love a girl, platonically or otherwise, without being somehow harmful
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